Cancer sucks

It hasn’t been a good last six months for my family. First my Mother-in-law had a heart atack and needed surgery. Then my wife’s aunt was flooded out of her house for a couple months. Then my Grandma died, and now my Dad has cancer.

I don’t think it’s really set in yet. He is still going through tests, but they think he has Multiple Myeloma, which is bone caner. They first thought he was having kidney problems because they were only running at 20% and the protein in his blood was off the charts. They now think the cause of the high protein is the cancer, and they are filtering his blood hoping his kidneys start functioning properly. Originally there was talk about a kidney transplant, and I hope it doesn’t come to that. I don’t know if I would be a proper match, but if I was that would be a really hard decision to make. Now that they think it’s cancer, the tough reality is he probably wont live long enough for a kidney transplant to be worthwhile.

It’s still early in his diagnosis, and we don’t know much yet, but of course we are hoping for the best. I kind of feel guilty for not feeling too sad. Death doesn’t scare me though. It’s going to happen to all of us. Hopefully later rather than sooner. I’m constantly thinking about my Dad, but it does no good for me to get worked up and worried about him. What happens will happen. I’m sure I will feel much different after I visit him next weekend, and everything becomes more real, but for now it is what it is and I’m hoping for the best.